We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
