Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
