It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize