are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
