Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
