I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
