I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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