I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
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