This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
