This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
