did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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