He had one of those small greek statue penises
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
