Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
