I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I cut my penus on the lid.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Randomize
