don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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