Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just gargled with NyQuil
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
