i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Everyone says I win the strip club
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
