she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I got her a Nickelback box set.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
be right there i have to get my cape
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
