I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Who wears a wallet chain?!
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
