with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize