In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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