So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Randomize
