What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
