It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
