I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
