Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
