I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
