OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
