I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
