i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
