He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
