Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
we're so committed to being not committed
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
