have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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