in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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