I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
