I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
