That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
