Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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