i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
