i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize