im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
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