Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
