whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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