the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
