I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize