are you still at the devil's house?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
