Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize
