there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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