I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
