she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize