he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Randomize
