Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize